The 5 Energy Drink Armies of the Apocalypse

The order of a world hangs on the brink of destruction. A world of sub-freezing temperatures well lit behind a glass door leading into the abyss beyond. One energy drink, a drink that has stood in defiance to the passage of time in a raging American economy. One energy drink holds its ground in the face of destruction.Destruction from the five most powerful energy drink armies known to man. Five armies so fierce, so large, that they shake the very shelves they stand on. The sole energy drink standard spawned with the beginning of time itself now fights in the eclipse of the Five Armies.

The Five Armies of Amp, Monster, Sobe, Rip-It, and Rockstar have all found their way to the battlefield. Tradition will battle evolution in the ultimate showdown. One will survive. One will fall. One lone energy drink blogger will risk it all. Risk it all to tell all as he covers the results of the epic battle. What army will reign supreme and threaten the very nature of the current world? Read on… or take cover.”


This is Pepsi’s entry into the market. It started with the timeless and irresistibly tasty original Amp. This was one of the first¬†energy vitamins to break away from the standard energy drink flavor, and in hindsight was ahead of its time. Drink makers to this day have a hard time producing energy drinks with such a wonderful better-than-soda flavor. The Amp line quickly evolved with the addition of 5 other variations and a couple of recent tea additions. The line-up does not have one bad tasting drink, but a lack of energy plagues each and every one of them.

  • Variety: 3/5
  • Taste: 4/5
  • Energy: 2/5

Total: 9/15


This drink line-up is one mean powerhouse of taste, energy, tradition, and advertising power. The original Monster started out slow in the needy niche of the videogamer, but soon evolved into motor sports. Monster now undeniably commands the motor sport genre, and has won over the hearts of many average energy drink consumers with its unique taste and impressive energy offerings. It’s hard to not be intrigued by a can graphic of a monster inside the can clawing to get out. Monster’s popularity grew exponentially as soon as it started finding its way out of LAN gaming sessions to more and more gas station shelves, and soon added 4 other variations. Even more, Monster branched out extensively with their Java line-up to cater to the bean and tea lovers out there.

  • Variety: 4/5
  • Taste: 3/5
  • Energy: 4/5


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